ROC – Philotimo: An important attribute in the raising of children – Part 2

Meeting Outline

24 October 2019

With God’s Grace, the mothers’ and children’s group met yesterday at the Monastery. We discussed “Philotimo: an important attribute in the raising of children (1)” based on the teachings of St Paisios.

St Paisios always valued Philotimo and leventia: two characteristic elements of the Greek culture throughout the centuries. It is difficult to translate these words into any other language, yet we could describe what they mean. Today we will concentrate on Philotimo.

Someone who has Philotimo externalises a kind of sacrificial love that naturally and effortlessly comes from within. A kind of love that is able to feel what the other person truly needs, and provide it to him. Whether it be of material nature or spiritual. The person who has Philotimo does not know it. A fountain of goodness and humility pours from within, and is anything but self-centred.

Importantly, he is always immensely grateful to God and to everyone around him, for everything that happens in his life.  He constantly thanks God for the blessings, but also the difficulties and tribulations in his life. Because he sees only good in everything. He forgets really easily anything bad done to him, but he always remembers and cherishes even the smallest kindness shown to him. And he keeps trying to repay it for the rest of his life.Is this what we do? When a friend of ours, who has helped us a lot over the years, once does something we do not particularly like, either intentionally or unintentionally, what do we do? Do we concentrate on the many good things he has done for us, or on the one not so good thing?

And inversely, when someone helps us at a time we need help, do we cherish and remember this and try to do the same to him and to others, or do we easily forget the help we received, taking it for granted?

People who have Philotimo are indeed noble souls as Saint Paisios used to say. When someone asked the Saint whether loving the one who benefitted us is Philotimo, he answered, no; as Christ said, even the gentiles love their own. Philotimo is to offer your love and care unconditionally, to ANYONE who needs it. Even to our “enemies”. Even to people who hurt us; because it is not they who hurt us, but the tempter who tempts them to do so. Instead, we should pray for those of our brothers and sisters who go against us or hurt us. THAT is Philotimo. That is true love. Taking example from our Saviour, Christ himself, who before his last breath on the cross prayed for those who crucified Him.

Philotimo is imitating Christ. With discernment, sensitivity and nobility as Saint Paisios said. The one who has Philotimo is not a fool; he is full of Christ’s love.